“We won’t be starting our own blog anytime soon,” I wrote, a few short months ago. And then we started to hear from WGT community members and folks on Twitter who thought we should do exactly that. Some of their reasons felt pretty compelling.
They thought our relationship with the Joneses provided a unique vantage. They liked the idea of being able to follow along with us as a real couple dipping our toes into LS waters and navigated its ins and outs, ups and downs – from the very beginning. They liked our cheeky writing style (flattery will get you everywhere with me).
So we started to discuss it.
In an astonishingly short amount of time (so much for not “anytime soon”), we decided that we did sort of want to heed this call to write about our journey/experiences and share our ideas — from the perspective of newbies — with others in the Lifestyle. But there were other considerations.
How could we protect our privacy/identity? How could we make sure to meet & date others as our own authentic selves and not as blogger personae? Aren’t there enough blogs about the LS out there already? What would make ours unique? How could we keep the blog from driving our LS exploration, rather than the other way around, and still provide quality content on a regular basis? What if, ultimately, we decide that after entering the LS, it’s not actually for us after all?
The privacy and identity/persona bit we worked out pretty easily, with some input from the Joneses – who know a thing or two about that topic. The content question resolved itself when we realized we have a lot to say about topics tangentially related to the Lifestyle – sexuality research, sex positivity, sexual health and self-care, opinions on LS-related products, books, services, and events. We were pretty certain we could create a blog experience/voice different than the others already out there. And then we realized that there may also be an audience for the erotic lit Elle has thus far written only for our own enjoyment.
Once we realized we didn’t have to limit our content to exclusively our own experiences, the blog concept bloomed, and our discussion rapidly moved from whether we would do it to how best to do it. We agreed to write and publish elleandess.blog* through the first year of our LS exploration, then revisit to see where we stand with all of it.
We can’t promise the blog will continue past a year. We can’t promise we will stay in the LS. What we can promise is that our posts will be candid and will chronicle more than just the positive elements of our journey. You’ll read about our mistakes, missteps, fears, back-tracking, and insecurities along with our fun and sexy times.
Because we had so boldly asserted that we had no plans to blog, we were gonna title this post ‘Sometimes Elle Lies,’ but Mr. Jones – ever generous and diplomatic – suggested that Elle doesn’t lie so much as ‘evolve her thinking.’
And that’s what the LS has so far proven to be about for us, more than anything else – evolving.
In just these last few months, we’ve noticed our communication with each other evolving (exponentially), our outlook on relationships and sex evolving, and our perception of what can be evolving. We’re extremely happy and grateful to have Mr. & Mrs. Jones as friends and guides. The We Gotta Thing Community membership has introduced us to others with both similar and differing perspectives, and at various places in the LS journey – incredibly valuable to our growth.
And, really, writing about all of this has also facilitated rapid evolution (never underestimate the value of journaling – even if you don’t decide to go back on your sacred word and publish a blog, like we did).
At this point, we don’t plan to listen to the instigators trying to get us to podcast. But, hey, never say ‘never.’
*Those of you who are sleuth-y will notice that the first posting dates on elleandess.blog pre-date our last guest post here at WGT. Explanation: Through the wonder and magic of Internet publishing, we wrote the first E&E posts mid-December and post-dated them, so that people see an accurate start date for our foray into the LS rather than our foray into blogging. So, the dates on the earliest posts are an approximation of the dates the things in them happened, not the date the post was actually written/posted (see? Sometimes Elle lies). From late December through the present, blog dates have caught up to real life and are accurate to both the timeframe of the events in the post and when the post was written/published.