And just like that it was over. I spent days, weeks, months (maybe years?) fantasizing, researching, thinking, talking, planning and preparing for this much anticipated moment and then….poof. Gone. Done. Over. What just happened? Though the memory is just a blur now, in the moment it sure was fun (I think).
Bodies are everywhere. Breathing and moaning are playing in surround sound. Feet, elbows and hands are moving over the bed like tentacles (oops, is that one hairy?). Unfamiliar noises (some from my wife), sharp fingernails across my back and even a little nipple biting (wait, did I like that?) ass slapping and hair pulling. And that smell…the unmistakable scent of sexual humidity hanging in the air.
I keep shaking my head and blinking my eyes trying to focus..but to no avail. It’s all a big blur. Someone I barely know just put me in her mouth! But wait, someone other than me has his head between my wife’s legs! And now I can’t exhale because my play partner just put my balls in her mouth! Did he just get a condom? No, my wife is showing him one of her signature hand job moves! Should I be bothered by that? It’s all so strange but damn it’s hot! Or is it?
Now my wife is with her! When did that happen? I can’t believe I’m watching this. Females look so natural together. Why is that? Can we just freeze time? I’m so thirsty. Where is my water? Wait..who cares about water! My wife is going down on another woman…and she apparently likes it! How does she know how to do that? I want to get involved but I want to watch too. Should I wait until I’m invited? The other guy is handing me a condom and nodding towards his wife. He’s offering but do I need ask her? Maybe I should just….hey, he’s already having sex with my wife! Damn condom, I should have practiced more…
Thinking back to my first (and maybe second, and third) sexual experience with another couple, it’s impossible to recall the details. Everything happened so fast. I remember wondering the next day if I enjoyed it. It was what I would now look back and call a “neutral” experience. Yes, it was fun (and I did have an orgasm) but there was so much to process. So much to take in. So much to think about. What made it even more interesting is I don’t remember “exactly” what happened and in what order. It was overwhelming. I’d been having sex for over 30 years yet I felt so ill-equipped.
Why would I expect it not to be? Another man with my wife after all these years. Trying desperately to please a woman I barely knew. The reality of the situation totally obliterating the pornographic scene I fantasized about for months. The waiting to see if one of us might feel jealous or feel guilty about what we did.
Maybe you are at the very early stages of wondering if the lifestyle is right for you. Maybe your first experience was so long ago you don’t even give it a second thought anymore. Maybe you recently “hit the ground running,” had a blast the first time and never looked back. Maybe you’re sliding down that slippery slope toward your first play experience in the swinging lifestyle and are imagining what it will really be like.
Or, maybe you’ve just had your first play experience, your head is still spinning, you’re thinking too much and you don’t know how to move forward. The answer is simple but not easy.
Do it again!