The fact that this popular Google swinger search phrase begins with “what” instead of “who” tells us how much work there is to be done to educate the general population when it comes to understanding the swinging lifestyle. Most people get can’t get beyond the “what” we (sometimes) do to even get close to the “who we are” part of the conversation. They simply fill in the blanks themselves and make the assumption that (to put it politely) “we” are not like “them.”
So let’s rephrase your question: “Who is a Swinger?”
Well, we are old and we are young. We are long-time married couples, we are newlyweds and we are single. We are spouses, partners, parents and grandparents. We vote for the left, the middle and the right. We are standing behind you in line at the grocery store and some of us sit next to you in church every week. We hold political offices, we are community leaders and we are your neighbors.
We teach your children, care for your health, protect and serve your community, defend your country, run your local businesses, build your cars, deliver your packages and yes, even preach to you every Sunday. We live in every neighborhood in every town, in every county in your state, in every state of the USA and in just about every country in the world.
We have solid marriages and maintain healthy relationships with family and friends. We are gay, lesbian, bisexual and heterosexual (and more). We experience real life struggles and successes. We enjoy working out and we are couch potatoes. We are healthy and we are disabled. We enjoy spending time together with our family, our friends and most of all each other.
In other words, we are just like you. But, we hope you’ll notice that some of us are a little…different.
We strive to be different by being less judgmental and more accepting. We are open to growing and to expanding our boundaries, and we try to not stay in our cozy little comfort zones. We yearn to know our partners in a deeper way and develop meaningful friendships with others. We strive to be open, honest, vulnerable, trustworthy and caring. In other words, we want to be more human.
Oh, and I almost forgot about the sexy part! Yes, we enjoy sex. Sex with our partners is much improved, more meaningful and newly exciting. And then on occasion we do enjoy fun sexy times with a few select friends (but you don’t need to fear us, we are not looking to have sex with you and have no intention of stealing your partner).
Lastly, we are far from perfect and we know it. We are not saying our way is the only way, nor are we saying our way is a better way. What we are saying is that we gotta thing and it works for us. Care to join us?