“What’s in It for Me?“

A Blog Post by Mrs Jones

I never planned to become a swinger. I was a “good girl,” and good girls don’t do crazy stuff like those swingers do. So why did I agree to give it a try four years ago when Mr Jones and I stumbled onto swinging during our first trip to Desire?

First of all, the idea of swinging where someone else could possibly desire me is intoxicating to my ego. I was a happily married wife of 29 years, a mom, a grandmother for Pete’s sake, and a professional when we found the lifestyle. Not exactly sexy mode at this stage of life. Sure, Mr Jones would still tell me that I was hot, but in my mind he was telling me that because that’s what good husbands do. I used to feel objectified when another guy would tell me I was hot because I was married and off limits. Ironically, I don’t feel that way anymore when someone in the lifestyle tells me that I’m attractive. Maybe because he is standing next to his wife when he says it? The bottom line is that I feel like I’m in control of my sexuality now, and can appreciate compliments from others, knowing that it is up to me (and Mr Jones) to decide if I want to return the attention.

Second, I have made some wonderful friends in the lifestyle, and yes I mean girlfriends! It’s so much fun to play with a lady’s husband (while she is playing with mine) and then have a conversation with her about it afterwards, giggling about what just happened and talking about how hot our husbands are. Women can be so judgmental and competitive in everyday life, but my experience with women in the lifestyle is that we admire and appreciate one another. No need for competition here. We are all in it to share sexy experiences and make solid friendships, all the while confident that our relationships with our spouses are secure.

And last but definitely not least, my relationship with Mr. Jones has deepened and intensified as a result of our swinging adventures. We are a formidable team! The fact that we can open our relationship to the amazingly sexy, intelligent, fun people that we have encountered in the lifestyle and yet confidently go home together after every adventure validates our unwavering devotion and love for one another.
So yeah, there’s a lot in it for me!

2 Comments
  • C&E
    Posted at 07:35h, 05 November Reply

    Funny, just last night, at the end of a very fun and sexy afternoon and evening with one of our favorite couples, my husband was telling me pretty much the same thing about how it made him feel to be desired by another woman. I just showed him your blog post and how you described it… “intoxicating to my ego”. As usual, you have a true gift for describing and/or explaining things so perfectly. Very well said! So looking forward to meeting you next week!

  • BobAndCarol
    Posted at 10:24h, 05 November Reply

    Well said Mrs. Jones! We appreciate the thoughtfulness and all the energy that you put into your newsletter and your podcast!

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